Grand Panorama Hotel (Seray Club) – Reviews. Grand Panorama Hotel (Seray Club) – Reviews Location and surroundings

First trip to Turkey, so there is nothing to compare it with. I'll leave my impressions.

The first thing I encountered: there is no gym at the hotel. I had to look in the city (I found it for 20 lire at a time).

There is also no bathhouse, no sauna, no billiards or other facilities. No matter what travel agents tell you, it’s all rut. The hotel blames the travel agency, TA blames the hotel. There are no ends to be found.

Next is check-in. I quickly looked at the documents, I confirm. 5 minutes and to the rooms. But the room they were given was not so great (the balcony was stained with something, the view was of barbed wire), although without conflict they offered others of the same class.

The room is not 4-star, that's for sure. TV from the 90s on a rickety shelf, a lot of minor defects. In the shower, the shower curtain immediately flew off, and for the entire 7 days, water flowed in thin streams onto the tiles, onto which, out of desperation, I threw a towel to avoid slipping. Bath amenities: soap, shampoo, toilet paper and 3 towels for three. This is all. You'll have to buy the rest if you didn't get yours.

I’ll leave a bunch of minor annoyances in the room; in fact, we only need it to sleep at night and store things during the day.

Elevator: one of 2 works. There is no discomfort, the view is excellent. The glass is really dirty. Darkens.

The reception is also a Wi-Fi zone (it only works there). I don’t know if it was special or how it happened, but it’s very cool. All the nerdy guests sit there, and not in rooms where there is no Internet. It seems like a general gathering place.

Restaurant. I can’t say anything bad about the kitchen: although it’s not very diverse, it’s a good selection. If you are not a fan of eating everything at once, you will not have time to get bored. 3 times a day + afternoon snack with cookies. In my opinion, the food is at least 4+.

Bar. There is a minus here. They pour water. I tried to get drunk with beer. Started at 10:00, at 16:00 I got tired of running to the counter, bought an alcoholic beverage in a nearby store. The information is that the air is sea, so you won’t get drunk - it’s a standard local rush. The story is similar with other drinks. Positive point: no drunken scandals. A positive theme is tea next to the bar. Excellent tea. The rest of the bar is just for show.

Pool. Open from 8:00 to 18:00. The water is ok, there are always sunbeds available, some of them beaten down by life. The slide works according to schedule, making everyone happy.

Staff. All 5 stars here. Courteous, friendly, dirty dishes simply evaporate from the table. I would like to especially note that one representative service on a voluntary basis, invites guests to play basketball after 22:30. He will also tell you what and where to see, where you can listen to local authorities on Turkish music. You will need to communicate with him only in English, because Russian is a problem there. I gave him a prot shaker as a souvenir because it was unnecessary, because he began to drink out of sadness and sadness, having forgotten about the sports mode.

We checked in immediately (before 12-00) and had time for lunch. They gave me a 2-bedroom penthouse on the 5th floor with a view of Marmaris and the sea, so I can’t say anything bad about the hotel! I immediately liked this hotel! I’ll just note some features and attach photographic materials....More ▾ We checked in immediately (before 12-00) and had time for lunch. They gave me a 2-bedroom penthouse on the 5th floor with a view of Marmaris and the sea, so I can’t say anything bad about the hotel! I immediately liked this hotel! I’ll just note some features and attach photographic materials. Please note that the hotel concept changes constantly (more often than once a season, so it is important to write reviews and read them too).
The first thing you should pay attention to is that the hotel is located as far as possible from the beach. And that will never change. Some people write that you have to walk for 40 minutes in the heat, but we walked longer. And after that we always used local minibuses (dolmus) No. 2 and No. 3 for 2 liras per nose (stop 5 minutes from the hotel, focus on the minaret of the mosque). You can catch dolmushi everywhere along their route, the drivers are very responsive. When you pay, be sure to say the name of the hotel - Seray Club and they can take you higher, or rather, closer to the hotel. Everything here is very mountainous and confusing, although very beautiful. In general, if you are not in the best physical shape (elderly, children, disabled) you should not come here.
Although, the hotel takes you to the beach for free (2 times in the morning at 9 and 9-30 and one for lunch at 12-30, and another at 14-00 to the beach). But we only used this service once, because the bus was as cramped as a tin can.
The hotel itself is very nice, the staff is polite, but English-speaking (although our English were supplanted a long time ago). But managers speak Russian, some are worse, some are better. There are only vacationers from the Russian Federation and Ukraine. No bracelets are given upon check-in.
They cleaned well. Of course, there is a difference when you leave a dollar or not, but it doesn’t matter. They thought that, like in Egypt, they wouldn’t clean it before leaving, but they wanted to. There are no "do not disturb" signs. We wanted not to be disturbed and refused to be cleaned, so the manager immediately came running to find out what the problem was. So everything is serious, guests are given attention. And there are cameras hanging all around, which I think is normal. Although, only ours were outrageous. Only they, the cheerful conquerors of Bar Street, can return at 3 am and scream. The hotel makes transfers to the city at 21-30, but no one is taking them back, so all night long someone returns to sleep for a couple of hours and run to breakfast. So it's not quiet here. Music at the pool bar also until late at night. We were lucky with the room, so we couldn’t hear it, although the elevator was noisy (the wall of the back room was adjacent to the elevator shaft). One booth immediately broke down and was never repaired, so it was quieter. But there is no soothing silence, life is in full swing.
There is no animation. Groups of young people entertain themselves, spending the whole day by the pool drinking beer and sunflower seeds and listening to something like rap (I remember a song about a super-sexy guy who suffered from this). And in the evening most people go to town to have fun!
Wi-Fi is good, but since everyone is sitting in it, there is not enough for everyone.
Food. There is no porridge in the morning. Only cereal. They don't cook scrambled eggs, only boiled eggs. Meat is difficult, but there is chicken (in the form of vegetable goulash or cutlets). Once there were fish cakes. There were sausages, cats eat them, so it’s normal. There are a lot of side dishes, a lot of cottage cheese in the form of snacks and different cheeses. There weren't many eggplants, but there were tasty peppers. There are salads, arugula, cucumbers, and tomatoes. One type of soup for lunch and evening. There are sweets too. The only fruits are watermelons. We didn't go hungry. It’s just that everyone is pushing towards the opening and sweeps away everything at once, so you have to calculate the time for the second take-out of food. We only went to lunch twice, since it was not convenient to return to the hotel so far away, and had a snack in the city. I think for this hotel it is better not to take all inclusive, but only breakfast and lunch. We drank gin as a drink, but didn't like the wine.
Water. They poured their bottles from the drinks dispenser (there was a button for clean water). And drinks like juices (pineapple, orange, apple, cherry). We also bought water and iced tea in the city in large supermarkets (Migros, Shock, etc. - at the same time we exchanged money, paying in dollars, the exchange rate here is better than in money changers.). It looked like it was bottled drinking water It's cheaper in Turkey than in independent Turkey.
Beach. They take you to the embankment, where there are a lot of beaches. Some are hotel, some are in cafes, some are wild. You choose for yourself. But they bring you to a certain place, and at the beginning you stay here to get comfortable (since there are amenities nearby - toilet, shower). You pay for a sunbed and umbrella by buying a drink (the cheapest is 16 liras). Very cramped. Cheaper wild beach(closer to the port) – you don’t have to pay there (there are amenities), but there are no sun loungers and umbrellas. This is important because the sun is very hot and you will burn instantly, there is nowhere to hide. You need your own towels. The wild beach near the port is cleaner than the one we were on originally. On the paid beach there is a film of fuel and debris that blows away from yachts. In general, we went to the wild beach in Icmeler (3 liras per nose on dolmus), it was cleaner and less crowded. By the way, in past years the hotel took vacationers precisely towards Icmeler to Nirvana Beach, where there is excellent water, and all around there are mountains and forests. But the concept of the hotel has changed, and they no longer carry people here. Now Nirvana Beach is a wild beach without sun loungers and umbrellas (there is nowhere to hide from the sun), but there are some amenities - a toilet and a fountain with drinking water (they rinsed off there with a bottle). It looks like the cafe is starting to open, and you can have a snack. Something may change - umbrellas are needed there. And at this stage, you can choose any beach in Marmaris - wild or paid.
Although, for the lazy or budget-conscious, there is a swimming pool that does not smell much of chlorine. There is a section for kids and a slide that is turned on periodically. And unlimited drinks. You don't have to leave the hotel anywhere.
In general, since before that we were in three, we liked this four. The only drawback, as usual, is the hotel guests, noisy and ill-mannered. We liked everything else, apparently we were lucky.

The hotel is located 2 km from the center of Marmaris. Dalaman Airport is 95 km from the hotel. Nearby hotels: Julian Forest Hotel.

HOTEL INFORMATION

The hotel was opened in 1999, the last renovation took place in 2013. The total area of ​​the territory is 4,000 sq.m. Consists of a main 4-story building. For convenience there is an elevator.

The hotel does not accommodate guests with disabilities.

Payments accepted bank cards Visa, MasterCard, Amex.

Beach

Public sand beach is located 2.5 km from the hotel, across the road. There is a shuttle to the beach, free of charge (once a day). Sun loungers, umbrellas, mattresses - for a fee. Entering the sea - sand.

Infrastructure

  • outdoor swimming pool, 84 sq.m
  • indoor pool, 29 sq.m
  • main restaurant
  • pool bar
  • Internet cafe (paid)
  • minimarket

Important

Pets are not allowed.

ROOMS

The hotel has 104 rooms, overlooking the sea and mountains.

The rooms include: individual air conditioning, satellite TV with Russian channels, direct dial telephone, minibar (empty), bath, hairdryer, balcony, safe (for a fee), extra bed (on request).

Floor covering: ceramic tiles.

Room cleaning: daily.

Linen change: 2 times a week.

Change of towels: 3 times a week.

Additional room service.

  • 68 Standart Room - room area 21 sq.m., maximum occupancy 2+1, 3 people.
  • 36 Family Room - room area 32 sq.m., 2 bedrooms, max. 3+2 people

NUTRITION CONCEPT

AI - all inclusive

The concept includes: breakfast, lunch, dinner - Buffet, afternoon tea, local alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks (10.00 - 22.00).

Imported drinks and cocktails, bottled drinks, energy drinks, fresh juices, Turkish coffee, ice cream, room service - for a fee.

SERVICES

For free

  • table soccer

Paid

  • Turkish bath, sauna, massage
  • salon
  • billiards
  • darts
  • table tennis

Other services

  • currency exchange
  • Wi-Fi (free, in the lobby)
  • laundry
  • medical services
  • car rent
  • photographers Service

FOR CHILDREN

  • cot on request
  • children's outdoor pool, 6 sq.m.
  • playground
  • Children's chairs are available in the restaurant
  • nanny (paid)

We checked in immediately (before 12-00) and had time for lunch. They gave me a 2-bedroom penthouse on the 5th floor with a view of Marmaris and the sea, so I can’t say anything bad about the hotel! I immediately liked this hotel! I’ll just note some features and attach photographic materials....More ▾ We checked in immediately (before 12-00) and had time for lunch. They gave me a 2-bedroom penthouse on the 5th floor with a view of Marmaris and the sea, so I can’t say anything bad about the hotel! I immediately liked this hotel! I’ll just note some features and attach photographic materials. Please note that the hotel concept changes constantly (more often than once a season, so it is important to write reviews and read them too).
The first thing you should pay attention to is that the hotel is located as far as possible from the beach. And that will never change. Some people write that you have to walk for 40 minutes in the heat, but we walked longer. And after that we always used local minibuses (dolmus) No. 2 and No. 3 for 2 liras per nose (stop 5 minutes from the hotel, focus on the minaret of the mosque). You can catch dolmushi everywhere along their route, the drivers are very responsive. When you pay, be sure to say the name of the hotel - Seray Club and they can take you higher, or rather, closer to the hotel. Everything here is very mountainous and confusing, although very beautiful. In general, if you are not in the best physical shape (elderly, children, disabled) you should not come here.
Although, the hotel takes you to the beach for free (2 times in the morning at 9 and 9-30 and one for lunch at 12-30, and another at 14-00 to the beach). But we only used this service once, because the bus was as cramped as a tin can.
The hotel itself is very nice, the staff is polite, but English-speaking (although our English were supplanted a long time ago). But managers speak Russian, some are worse, some are better. There are only vacationers from the Russian Federation and Ukraine. No bracelets are given upon check-in.
They cleaned well. Of course, there is a difference when you leave a dollar or not, but it doesn’t matter. They thought that, like in Egypt, they wouldn’t clean it before leaving, but they wanted to. There are no "do not disturb" signs. We wanted not to be disturbed and refused to be cleaned, so the manager immediately came running to find out what the problem was. So everything is serious, guests are given attention. And there are cameras hanging all around, which I think is normal. Although, only ours were outrageous. Only they, the cheerful conquerors of Bar Street, can return at 3 am and scream. The hotel makes transfers to the city at 21-30, but no one is taking them back, so all night long someone returns to sleep for a couple of hours and run to breakfast. So it's not quiet here. Music at the pool bar also until late at night. We were lucky with the room, so we couldn’t hear it, although the elevator was noisy (the wall of the back room was adjacent to the elevator shaft). One booth immediately broke down and was never repaired, so it was quieter. But there is no soothing silence, life is in full swing.
There is no animation. Groups of young people entertain themselves, spending the whole day by the pool drinking beer and sunflower seeds and listening to something like rap (I remember a song about a super-sexy guy who suffered from this). And in the evening most people go to town to have fun!
Wi-Fi is good, but since everyone is sitting in it, there is not enough for everyone.
Food. There is no porridge in the morning. Only cereal. They don't cook scrambled eggs, only boiled eggs. Meat is difficult, but there is chicken (in the form of vegetable goulash or cutlets). Once there were fish cakes. There were sausages, cats eat them, so it’s normal. There are a lot of side dishes, a lot of cottage cheese in the form of snacks and different cheeses. There weren't many eggplants, but there were tasty peppers. There are salads, arugula, cucumbers, and tomatoes. One type of soup for lunch and evening. There are sweets too. The only fruits are watermelons. We didn't go hungry. It’s just that everyone is pushing towards the opening and sweeps away everything at once, so you have to calculate the time for the second take-out of food. We only went to lunch twice, since it was not convenient to return to the hotel so far away, and had a snack in the city. I think for this hotel it is better not to take all inclusive, but only breakfast and lunch. We drank gin as a drink, but didn't like the wine.
Water. We poured them into our bottles from the drinks dispenser (there was a button for clean water). And drinks like juices (pineapple, orange, apple, cherry). We also bought water and iced tea in the city in large supermarkets (Migros, Shock, etc. - at the same time we exchanged money, paying in dollars, the exchange rate here is better than in money changers.). It seemed that bottled drinking water is cheaper in Turkey than in independent Turkey.
Beach. They take you to the embankment, where there are a lot of beaches. Some are hotel, some are in cafes, some are wild. You choose for yourself. But they bring you to a certain place, and at the beginning you stay here to get comfortable (since there are amenities nearby - toilet, shower). You pay for a sunbed and umbrella by buying a drink (the cheapest is 16 liras). Very cramped. The wild beach (closer to the port) is cheaper - you don’t have to pay there (there are amenities), but there are no sun loungers and umbrellas. This is important because the sun is very hot and you will burn instantly, there is nowhere to hide. You need your own towels. The wild beach near the port is cleaner than the one we were on originally. On the paid beach there is a film of fuel and debris that blows away from yachts. In general, we went to the wild beach in Icmeler (3 liras per nose on dolmus), it was cleaner and less crowded. By the way, in past years the hotel took vacationers precisely towards Icmeler to Nirvana Beach, where there is excellent water, and all around there are mountains and forests. But the concept of the hotel has changed, and they no longer carry people here. Now Nirvana Beach is a wild beach without sun loungers and umbrellas (there is nowhere to hide from the sun), but there are some amenities - a toilet and a fountain with drinking water (they rinsed off there with a bottle). It looks like the cafe is starting to open, and you can have a snack. Something may change - umbrellas are needed there. And at this stage, you can choose any beach in Marmaris - wild or paid.
Although, for the lazy or budget-conscious, there is a swimming pool that does not smell much of chlorine. There is a section for kids and a slide that is turned on periodically. And unlimited drinks. You don't have to leave the hotel anywhere.
In general, since before that we were in three, we liked this four. The only drawback, as usual, is the hotel guests, noisy and ill-mannered. We liked everything else, apparently we were lucky.

Nice hotel in a great location.
We spent a week at this hotel in mid-August 2019 as a family with a teenage son. The hotel was chosen consciously, knowing all its nuances, through the tour operator Anextur. Now, in order.
Room. We arrived in the evening. We were immediately accommodated in a two-room suite (317), which was unexpectedly pleasant, because... We booked a one-room double room with extra. bed. The room is very bright. clean and spacious: in one room there is a double bed, air conditioning, a mirror, in the other there are two single beds, a TV, a wardrobe, no air conditioning, the bathroom is also spacious, the shower worked properly, there was hot water at any time of the day, there is liquid soap, toilet paper, two towels for each person, plastic table and chairs on the balcony. The room is located at the end of the building closer to the mountain, so there was a view of the mountain on one side and the city on the other side, it was very quiet, you couldn’t hear any noise. They came to clean the room every other day, of course, the cleaning was superficial, but we didn’t have much of a mess or dirt, the towels were changed once, there was wet cleaning once, the trash was taken out every other day.
Nutrition. Breakfast from 8-00 to 10-00, lunch from 12-30 to 14-00, afternoon tea from 16-30 to 17-00, dinner from 19-30 to 21-00, free bar open from 10-00 to 22- 00. The canteen works strictly according to a schedule; it does not open earlier and does not close later. The food itself is quite good, ordinary Turkish, with lots of vegetables, herbs, cheeses and delicious bread. For breakfast, porridge, boiled eggs or scrambled eggs, some sausages/sausages, French fries, cheeses, sauces, jams, etc., breakfast cereals such as chocolate balls, muesli, cereal. For lunch there was cream soup, several types of side dishes, chicken, some semi-finished cutlets, sausages, once there was fish, a lot of salads, vegetables, herbs, Turkish sweets. For afternoon tea they usually bake pizza in their own oven. For dinner it's almost the same as for lunch. There was watermelon every day. There is tea and coffee in the bar. unlimited alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks at any time.
Territory. Very modest, like everywhere else in Marmaris. There is a swimming pool with one slide, which starts working after lunch and until 18-00. The pool closes at this time. There is a small children's playground.
Location. The hotel is really located high on the mountain and very far from the sea; we walked for about an hour at a walking pace. There is a bus from the hotel to the city beach according to the schedule: 9-00 and 9-30 to the beach, 12-30 to the hotel for lunch, 14-00 to the beach, 17-30 to the hotel, 20-30 to the city center (one way ). If necessary, an additional flight is carried out. The city beach itself is a narrow strip between the city embankment and the sea, 14 km long. The sea, of course, is not crystal clear, but you can swim, especially in the morning. The beach is divided between bars, which have sun loungers and umbrellas, for purchasing a cocktail or something at the bar you are provided with a sun lounger and an umbrella, as well as access to the bar’s Wi-Fi, there is also a part free from them, but the sand there is less clean, the bottom is pebbles .
Beaches in the area: we went to Nirvana Beach a couple of times (we went by free bus from the hotel to the beach, then changed to an orange bus going to Icmeler, the fare is 3 liras. Nirvana Beach is located in front of the village of Icmeler. The beach system is the same as in Marmaris itself. We were accommodated in a free area without sunbeds, but the sea in this part is transparent and clean, the bottom is rocky, but not dangerous, the best that can be found. We were on the beach in Icmeler, there is sand everywhere, so the water is not as clear as at Nirvana Beach and there are a lot of people. Although the village itself is quite nice and quiet.
Entertainment and excursions. The only excursion. which we bought from the guide Anekstur - this bus tour to Dalyan. Departure from the hotel at 8-00, the journey is a little over an hour, on the way we stopped at a wine cellar, naturally there were few wine buyers, because... the prices are really inflated. Then we boarded two boats and went for a walk along the Dalyan River. The river is very beautiful, there are mountains around, Lycian tombs in the rocks. We sailed to the place where the river flows into the sea, stopped there in the reeds and, having received gear from the captain, caught a blue crab for about 30 minutes. Everyone caught the crab, some were able to pull out several pieces. True, we had to release them into the water later, but we really enjoyed the process. Everyone ordered boiled crab from the guide, which they were supposed to receive after visiting the beach. After catching the crab we had 1.5 hours to beach holiday. The beach at the confluence of the river and the sea is simply fantastic, fine white and clean sand everywhere. the water is clear and clean. On the beach there is a fenced part of the territory where turtles come to lay eggs, and the clutches themselves are marked with cages. There is a small cafe, changing rooms, toilets, showers (though with salt water). After returning to the boats, cooked crab was already waiting for us, I recommend trying it for fun, it costs $10, and you can feed the remains of the crab to a turtle, which swam straight to the boat and caused indescribable delight among all participants in the excursion. After some active turtle photography, we headed back down the river for lunch. Lunch turned out to be excellent, with a choice of chicken shish kebab (very tasty), fish, chicken nuggets, several salads and side dishes, one drink, and watermelon. After lunch, we boarded a bus and went to the mud clinic, where we stayed for about 1.5 hours, smeared ourselves with mud, and swam in the thermal pool. The dirt was washed off under an outdoor shower with running water, a little cool, but... It was hot outside, which was even good, we changed clothes in the locker room and took the bus back to the hotel by 18 o’clock. I thoroughly enjoyed the excursion; the cost from Anextur is $45 per person.
At a street agency we bought an excursion-trip on ATVs, and paid $50 for three. In the morning we were picked up from the hotel and arrived at the place 30 minutes later. There we waited a bit for all the participants to gather, and were briefed (and we were the only Russians) in English. which they had difficulty understanding, but they guessed that they could buy glasses and a bandana to protect them from dust. We bought only one bandana for our son for 20 liras; we had everything else of our own. You can also leave things in the safe for a small fee, but we didn’t do this, we packed the backpack in a bag and took it with us. Then everyone got on their ATVs and started a practice run. during which we were doused with water and driven into the mud. After 20 minutes we hit the road. which ran partly on asphalt and partly on dirt. The whole ride lasted probably 40 minutes, after which we returned to the base, where we rode through the mud and under the water jet several more times. We were photographed throughout the entire trip. but we didn’t plan to buy the photo. After the trip, you can take an outdoor shower and change clothes. By lunchtime we were back at the hotel. We had the most positive impressions, especially our son, but it’s a pity that we didn’t drive along a mountain river, although water and mud are also fun. By the way, the dirt from one T-shirt was never washed off... but that's not a big deal. because They specially wore clothes that they wouldn’t mind ruining.
While walking around the city, we visited the Marmara-Kalesi fortress. She is not big. well restored, there are several tiny halls with all sorts of exhibits. From the wall there is a beautiful view of the city and the sea.. Getting to the fortress is very easy, follow the signs through Old city. which is also quite interesting.
On public transport went to the Nemara cave. To get there, you need to take the pink minibus at the bus station near the Migros store near the city center (where the fountain is). The minibus stops right at the turn to this cave, then follow the signs on foot. The entrance to the cave turned out to be fenced off, but the people had already guessed to make a hole under the fence. The cave itself is very impressive, it is quite large, stalactites, stalagmites, it is hot outside and cold in the cave. From the cave the path went further up and we decided to follow it; after a couple of kilometers we reached the top, from which a simply “amazing” view of the bay opened up. Returning to the turn, we caught the same minibus with the same driver and returned safely.
Once we rented a three-seater electric moped and paid 200 liras for 2 hours. We rode a jet ski and parachute. We rented a car for one day ($40 rental plus gas). We decided to drive towards Datchi by car. On the way we visited the Maiden Spit (not particularly impressed, there are a lot of people, the sea is muddy, the usual sandbank for several kilometers, it’s not worth buying a special excursion for this) and the Turgut waterfall (it’s more interesting here, although the waterfall itself is no more than 3 meters, but we even We swam in the icy water, and then a bunch of people arrived with a jeep safari excursion and we immediately left). There is a very picturesque road to Datca, all the time you climb higher into the mountains and on both sides of the top you see the sea, beauty... The village itself is small and there are no foreign tourists there, the Turks themselves rest here. The city beach is small but very clean, and the sea is simply magical, fine white sand and clear water. The only negative is the strong wind, but this is the case everywhere because there are no closed bays, like in Marmaris. On the way back, after getting lost a little, we drove up to stone windmills. Very interesting buildings and well preserved.
In conclusion, I want to say that the nature of Marmaris and its surroundings amazes with its beauty and picturesqueness from the first second. Stunning mountains and blue sea, like in a magazine or on a postcard, air with the smell of pine needles, the songs of cicadas. This is a place for those who are ready to learn something new every day and are not afraid to travel distances for this or want to party and dance until the morning. If you need relaxing holiday on the beach or by the pool, then this is not the place.